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January 17, 2009

Conspiracy Report from Chicago Garage

Donald Pittenger writes:

Dear Blowhards --

It's frigid in much of the northern half of the USA this week. Perhaps that's why Iowahawk deposited a bit of frozen finger skin on the driver-side door handle as he climbed out of his hot rod, scraped the ice off the tip of his nose, warmed his trusty computer on a handy space heater and then posted this warning from the aliens amongst us.



posted by Donald at January 17, 2009


Attn: Proponents of AGW
The new term to use is "climate change." Thank you.

Posted by: Bring a Sweater on January 17, 2009 1:24 PM

but you're canadian, to yu we ALL are aliens...

Posted by: Ramesh on January 17, 2009 4:11 PM

Dear Blowhards:

Will you be working towards a Kotsko-free Net this year or not? Adam KotzkoSpeak--sort of Billy Sunday meets the cliffsnotes to Freud, via some bad parisian aesthetics--- defines blowhardness, as does the scribbling of his palsies.



Posted by: 00001001 on January 17, 2009 9:29 PM

I'm still waiting for guys like MQ or Chris White to show up and explain this whole global warming vs. climate change thing and set the rubes straight. They couldn't/wouldn't do it a few weeks ago and I doubt they can do it now. Hello, anyone...?

Posted by: Anon on January 18, 2009 1:12 PM

The climate constantly changes. What does that term mean?

Posted by: Nan on January 18, 2009 4:41 PM

I simply cannot forgive George W. Bush. He was never the president I or Conde Nast wanted him to be. If he was not going to proudly represent his Andover, Yale, HBS credentials, the least he could have done would be to pretend he cared about intelligence and stop trying to be so moral and religious all the time.

Posted by: PhilosophersAreBallerz on January 18, 2009 11:33 PM

Okay Anon, I'll bite. While analogies are a limited means of communicating allow me to try one.

You go to your doctor because you notice that your temperature is slowly rising. You also notice that your feet and hands feel particularly cold on occasion. This is sufficiently mysterious that your doctor brings in a dozen specialists to help him diagnose the problem.

Eight of the specialists say their best theory is that your two packs a day cigarette habit is causing metabolic changes impairing your ability to regulate your core temperature normally; furthermore this is causing changes in your circulation, which explains the cold extremities. They also believe that if you do not find a way to stabilize or reverse the trend you will suffer a wide range of negative side effects. Three agree that you are suffering metabolic changes, but discount cigarettes as the cause of your problems, although they agree it is an unhealthy habit. The last doctor, whose research lab is heavily subsidized by Philip Morris, says your problem is not one that anyone can do anything about and is certainly unconnected to your smoking. He suggests you move to the beach.

So, based on the consensus of opinions he has obtained your doctor advises you to cut back on the smoking. You've been smoking for forty years and are heavily addicted to nicotine. You know that kicking the habit will be difficult and painful. And besides, you like to smoke.

Do you make the attempt to reduce your smoking habit or do you move to the beach?

Posted by: Chris White on January 19, 2009 9:11 AM

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