James -- Don't be so indirect. Tell us what you really think.

Annette -- That bit of ass-kissing on Sommers' part was surprisingly blatant, wasn't it? Still, I think she makes some good points, do you? The younger guys and gals showing up in the mediabiz seem to show the effects of this strange anti-boy education kids are apparently getting. Most noticeable in the young guys, who seem to have no idea whatsoever how to be a guy. They're terrified of being guys, yet seem to crave it -- not a comfortable position for them to be in, or for us to deal with. (They're touchy about it.) It's as though masculinity has become a big joke -- yet there the kids go and love their rap music and Simpson-Bruckeheimer films. "Masculinity karaoke," as The Wife calls it. Do you see much of this around in your neck of the woods?

David -- We're trying to shame you into pushing on the blogging accelerator a bit harder. Go go go go go.

FvB -- I think it's safe to blame it on the Boomers. But then I think it's safe to blame just about everything on the Boomers. Still, it's fun to think about. The Boomers created teenagehood and adolescence as the ideal state -- still a dewy, innocent child, but with all those great new adult toys to play with. But they did so in opposition to a broadly-based adult culture. The Xers and especially Yers have grown up in a country with virtually no traditional adult values anywhere to be seen. They don't even seem to have heard of adulthood, or to have considered the possibility that there might be something to it, other than getting older and falling apart (which admittedly is a big part of it). So where the Boomers had some perspective on it (and endured, tediously, a lot of angst about it) the younger generations seem almost complex-free. And with computers, mood drugs, a political correctness providing a support structure for them, they've got no reason at all to question anything. Which leaves me wondering: how are they going to deal with it when the sap of youth recedes and the frustrations of middle-age start to accumulate? One of the virtues of traditional art and traditional society was that it helped prepare you for the rest of life. Living in a digital, electronic, all-pop-all-the-time, adolescence-is-great eternal present is super, I guess, so long as you're 16-25 and in good shape. But it doesn't develop any depth in you, or give your deeper emotions and imaginings any kind of workout. Such is my theory, anyway.

Dixon -- "Freeballing"? That's hilarious, thanks. I wonder if "going commando" is just for the gals. First time I heard it used was in an interview with Nicole Kidman, who seems to get a giggle out of being naughty.

Rick -- Hear, hear to that. Bizarre, isn't it? I mean, attending to the borders seems like one of the half dozen things a government absolutely positively has to do -- which should mean that there's an ongoing, open discussion about how it's being done. Yet, barely a word. Everyone seems paralyzed and terrified. You're either pro-immigration or anti-immigration, a moronic way of seeing these things. How about, for starters, being pro an ongoing and open discussion about the topic? Like I say, for starters.

Posted by: Michael Blowhard on August 6, 2003 3:41 PM

Thanks for the post, excellent links.

Regarding the Furedi article (and passing over the ever-so-precious tone for now), I wonder whether there might not be some link between the behaviors he observes and the popularity of delaying the start of families.

When families "just happened" soon after marriage, young parents soon found themselves with no free time and lots of children's toys, books, etc. Then, the parents weren't playing with children's toys, they were playing with children. Just ask them. 8-)

Of course, the toys chosen for children by their parents have always been the subject of jokes by others.

To return to that "tone" thing, though. 8-) I'm afraid that I don't see the moral advantage of traditionally adult occupations such as carpentry, yard work, or car repairs to "childish" pastimes such as video games. I've done all of them, and somehow I prefer Master of Orion 3 to dropping a torque converter on my finger. Torque converters hurt, I'm an adult, I'll pay someone with a higher pain tolerance.

And another thing (since I seem to be in full curmudge), in what substantial way is today's youth different from that of previous decades? Furedi decries a survey that indicates "that 20 percent of 16- to 24-year-olds spend an average of £3000 per year on travel." I'm sure that this is a higher percentage of young people with this freedom than in the generations that gave us Bertie Wooster and the Grand Tour, but how is it otherwise different? Did earlier generations not play games obsessively (Chess, Bridge, Whist, Parcheesi, Charades, etc.)?

Furedi could have just written, "The kids these days...."

Doug Sundseth

ps. Teletubbies!?? The kids these days!

pps. By the way, I'm no longer even in my 30s, lest this screed be seen as special pleading.

Posted by: Doug Sundseth on August 6, 2003 4:05 PM

FvB---Ok,Ok, and I actually agree more with your first theory than the second---that it's more "nurture" than "nature" with regard to dressing up in a girl's school uniform at the age of 27. I mean...in public :).

MB---interesting that you use the phrase "anti-boy" education. About 10-15 years ago a study was done on TV commercials which showed that 100% of the time, in commercials, where a man and a woman disagreed, the woman always 'won' the argument. I honestly think that was all backlash to the all-men-all-the-time world we had lived in before----like the old Geritol ad: "My wife...I think I'll keep her!"

But it had to have consequences, didn't it? Maybe nobody thought about the young boys growing up and coming of age. Especially since I've noticed that, gratingly, TV ads have continued to the point where they pretend a woman knows how and where to buy a car more efficiently than a man. Which, in my experience, is almost never the case. It's so dumb---women got tired of being marginalized, and objectified, and patronized (I always wanted the woman in the Geritol ad to turn and throw up on her smug spouse)and the only thing advertisers and self-helpers could think of to do is to do the same to men, like to get even. But I think that's gone far enough---why not just take what's best about both genders, and teach them BOTH that it's OK to be different and how to listen to each other. Men could stand to be more sensitive; women could stand to be braver. Wonder if we'll get there? Making boys write about their feelings in the dessert seems an unproductive path.

Posted by: annette on August 6, 2003 7:16 PM

"Feeling"? What's a "feeling"?

Posted by: Michael Blowhard on August 7, 2003 6:06 PM

Hmmm. Perhaps I - who once had a lovely conversation with Hoff-Sommers - have an agenda. In any case, I thought her positive comments on Bush and his buddies was describing their attitude in speaking, not suggesting that they got in the trenches.

Be brave as a woman is probably a bad idea. At least it is if you let is show. We live in a world were it's cute when freaking men are sissies about bugs and snakes and doing what a bear does in the woods, when in the woods.

M. Blowhard - Funny you should talk about guys who have no idea now to be a guy. I mostly meet girls who have no idea how to be a girl. They've rejected the idea of being feminine so don't wear girl clothes or "play games" - as though that's where it begins and ends. The end up wearing jeans and sweatshirts all the time, being used by boys they chase, and coming to me for advice when the finally get their job (a feat which required "playing games" through six to eight years of school and dozens of interships and interviews) and have no idea what to wear to the law firm's prom. It wouldn't be so bad if they had dumped bad girly things like whining and being babies and tattletales, and picked up some good snips and snails like being upfront and less interested in attention.

In odd contrast, most of the Spanish and African-American ladies I have known, who dress like borderline hoochies and would never for a minute do anything unladylike, have no problem whatsoever growing a big brass set when they have to get a job done.

Posted by: j.c. on August 10, 2003 6:23 PM

"...and picked up some good snips and snails like being upfront and less interested in attention."

I think being upfront as a woman takes a lot of bravery. I wasn't talking about who killed the bugs.

"...have no problem whatsoever growing a big brass set when they have to get a job done."

An unfortunate metaphor for women getting the job done. Could it be that girls don't know how to be women, and boys don't know how to be men, because of the examples being set?

Posted by: annette on August 12, 2003 10:59 PM






Post a comment

Name:


Email Address:


URL:


Comments:


Remember your info?